Help you?

2am. I wake up in pain. Back spasms. I try to stretch. Not working. 2:30am, I give. I take a muscle relaxant. Everyone else is fast asleep. I stay awake until I feel it working, then I crash.

7am. Animalia wakes up. "Maaaaamaaaaaaa, wheh aaahhhhh youuuuu?" Daht is still in bed, having stayed up late playing video games. I stumble to her camita, lift her out and into bed with me. She likes to sleep til 8, so maybe she'll fall back to sleep. I still feel the pill.

7:15am. Animalia is bouncing on and around us. We're barcos first, then horseys. Mama and Daht are still asleep.

7:30am. A tiny voice says "Mama help you?" I open one eye. Animalia is wedged in the narrow space between the wall and the bed. I can only see her from the shoulders up. She's giggling. "Mama help you?" she asks again. I manage to wake up and pull her out of the hole. She hugs and kisses. She also wants off the bed. I put her in her bedroom, immediately adjacent to our room, and she wanders away to play.

7:45am. I hear her tiny voice talking to her zapatos, putting on calcetines, talking to her dollies. Daht decides to wake up at this point. I struggle to open my eyes. He tells me that she's fine, they'll hang out together, go ahead and get some more sleep.

8:00am. Animalia has entertained herself for an hour. The struggle is over. Awake has won. "Mama help you?" is echoing in my mind. Guilt has won.